Adoption IS Trauma

Today’s adoptee story – Through writing this story, I became *very* angry with my biological mother for the first time since I met her almost ten …

Adoption IS Trauma

As an adoptee myself I know that there are specific things that I should be “grateful” for. I am grateful that my father worked every day to keep the lights on and food on the table. If they ever struggled financially I sure did not know it. I know that my life could have been worse if I was not adopted. I am well aware of these things. My parents were not happy with one another. I know now that is not my fault but when I was little I thought it was my fault. I thought for some reason I was a curse to all of my parents. My parents saying “she is adopted” or my telling doctors “I am adopted” all of the time puts a title on me. Perhaps maybe we should not say kids are adopted all of the time unless for medical reasons. I do not have the answer but I do Know adopted individuals feel a closer bond to others that are adopted. It is just a natural thing to feel. It seems like pretty normal feelings to feel “not accepted” or feel like an outcast in the adopted family. If you are adopting a child just know that there are certain feelings that your child will have no matter how much that you love them. You have to be ready for the whole adoption package. I think it is best to talk to other adoptees before you make the choice. You have to be there to lend a shoulder to cry on or there to openly listen to your child. Keep it real. Do NOT try too hard to show your love. We know when you are doing that. -Elizabeth